Homebound
by spanglemaker9
Summary: Edward ran away from his dead end Brooklyn neighborhood at the first opportunity, but never really found what he was looking for. Maybe that's because it was right where he left it. Written for Mad4hugh's fundraiser.


**When a fandom member, Mad4hugh, died in an accident at ComiCon last year, the fandom put together a fundraiser in her memory. This was my contribution and I realized yesterday that I never posted it to my profile.**

**Mad4hugh was a lovely person. She was a loyal reader and reviewer, and seeing her name in my inbox always made me smile. When I heard the tragic news from ComiCon, I felt like I'd lost a friend, even though I'd never met her. One of the best parts of this fandom are the connections we forge, despite our real life differences and the distances that separate us. We can also come together at time like this to do a good thing for people in need. Never forget those positives and let's never forget Gisela and the time she spent with us. **

*0*0*

"What are you drinking, Edward?" Emmett asked, leaning on the bar to get Hughie's attention.

"Ah…what do they have again?"

Emmett shot me a disbelieving look.

"What? It's been a million years since I was here last. I forgot," I said, holding my hands up in front of me in defense.

"Hughie, two Michs," Emmett shouted. Hughie tipped his chin at Emmett in acknowledgement.

"It's all that's decent," Emmett shrugged.

Hughie set two 22 ounce Styrofoam cups of Michelob draft in front of us. Christ, I forgot about this part of the Hanlon's experience; cheap beer in Styrofoam cups. I couldn't believe I spent so many hours of my youth hanging out in this place.

I looked around as I took the first sip. Everything looked just the same. The long wooden bar, the brass rail at my feet, the white tile floor, the long mirror along the wall, reflecting back the rows of liquor bottles, the tv in the upper corner of the room broadcasting a Mets game, and the lighting, too bright for your average bar. Even Hughie behind the bar was a younger copy of his father, Hughie Sr., who'd manned this bar since my grandfather's day. The TV was a flatscreen now, that was a little bit different, but otherwise nothing at Hanlon's ever changed. Even the flyers in the windows advertising the tag sale at Sacred Heart and the charity golf tournament out at Dyker Beach were the same. Except for the year printed on them, they might as well have been the same ones that were in the window back when Emmett, Jasper and I tried out our brand new ID's in Hanlon's six years ago. Not that we hadn't been drinking for years at that point. But growing up in the neighborhood the way we did meant that we had about zero chance of fooling Hughie Sr. with our bad fake ID's, so back in the day we used to have to wander over to Marine Park or Sheepshead Bay to bar hop.

"Geez, Em," I muttered, "I think it's the same old retired cops in the corner as the last time I was here." I tipped my head towards the guys clustered around a table, eyes on the flatscreen.

Emmett chuckled. "Yeah, those guys are here every night." He leaned over and banged his shoulder into mine. "I always thought we'd be just like those guys one day, sitting around, shooting the shit, complaining about how much the neighborhood has changed since we were kids."

I smiled, ignoring the unexpected twinge I felt. If that future was off the table now, that was nobody's doing but mine. Now the sight of those old guys growing roots in the corner of the bar made me feel nostalgic, but there was a time when I'd have chewed off my own arm to get clear of it. That inevitable future was exactly why I left Brooklyn three years ago and moved to Boston, where I knew almost no one. At the time, I thought I was setting the world on fire, choosing to leap into the unknown instead of letting my life fritter away in the same neighborhood where I'd been born, and my parents before me and their parents before them.

Now I was working in a firehouse in Arlington, living in an apartment in Somerville. Not that much different than when I'd been working in a firehouse in Flatbush. I hadn't exactly set the world on fire. In truth, all I could honestly say for myself was that I left Bayswater. Nobody ever leaves Bayswater. Everybody here was so impressed that I'd actually done it that I didn't have the heart to tell them that my life looked exactly the same in Boston as it had in Brooklyn.

"So," I said, to change the subject, "Rose doesn't mind you cutting out for the night?"

Emmett waved a hand, "Nah, as long as I'm not too drunk to take the three a.m. feeding with Ness when I get home, she's cool. She knows I wouldn't miss a chance to hang out with you now that you're finally back in the neighborhood."

"Is Jasper coming, too?"

"Of course, man! There's no way he'd miss you!" I was glad to hear that. One thing I'd learned in my time in Boston, friends like Emmett and Jasper weren't easily replaced. I had guys from the firehouse I hung out with, but none of them shared a history with me like Emmett and Jasper. I loved them like brothers. Well, Emmett was my cousin, so whatever. Everybody in Bayswater was practically related anyway, either on the Irish side or the Italian one.

"Besides," Emmett continued, "I think he wants you to meet Alice."

"Who's Alice?"

"The chick he's been dating. I think it's pretty serious."

"Is she from the neighborhood? I don't remember an Alice."

"Yeah, she went to Bishop Kenney, too, but she's younger than us. You might not have known her."

"Edward!"

"Speak of the devil!" Emmett laughed as Jasper's hand clamped down on his shoulder. I smiled in greeting and stood to give Jasper a one-armed hug. I really had missed him. He and Emmett were my childhood. We'd grown up in the neighborhood and gone all the way through school together. Emmett and I had joined the Fire Department and Jasper had enrolled in the Academy and become a cop, but we stayed friends in spite of that. After all, everybody in Bayswater grew up to be one or the other. The age-old cops vs. firefighters feud usually took a back seat to familial and neighborhood loyalties.

"Good to see you, man!" Jasper beamed at me. "You look great!"

"Thanks. You guys are holding up alright, too."

Jasper chuckled and signaled Hughie for a beer as he slid onto the stool on my other side.

"So, how's it feel visiting the old nabe again? Homesick?"

"More than I realized, actually."

Jasper shrugged. "It's not the same now, anyway. Things are changing like crazy around here."

"I see that," I nodded my head towards the plate glass window at the front of the bar, indicating the building caddy corner from Hanlon's, "What's that place?"

Emmett swiveled to glance over his shoulder. "Oh, The Pence and Pint. New bar. Opened about six months ago."

"What happened to the video store that was there? That place was there for a million years."

"Gone the way of the T-rex. Netflix did 'em in. That place came in, gutted it out. You should see it inside now…all this pressed tin bullshit and fancy lighting. Full of overflow hipsters from Williamsburg," Emmett said with a roll of his eyes.

"This whole neighborhood is full of overflow hipsters. They're about to run out the lifers like us," Jasper said.

"Nah," Emmett shook his head, "they'll never get rid of these old families. There'll always be Irish and Italians in Bayswater."

"You should see Vinelli's now," Jasper said after a moment, shaking his head.

"The liquor store?"

"Yeah, except old man Vinelli retired and now it's Bayswater Wine and Spirits. They have fucking wine tastings every Friday," Jasper chuckled. "Can you believe that shit? Wine tastings in Bayswater."

"Wine tastings, huh? That's a whole lot of excitement for a place like Bayswater," I said.

Emmett laughed and reached over to ruffle my hair. "Who needs wine tastings for excitement, though, when Edward Cullen is coming home to visit?"

"Shut up, man," I laughed and punched his arm before raking my hands through my hair to fix it.

"I'm telling you, as soon as your mom spread the word that you were coming home to visit, every single girl in the neighborhood went on high alert," Emmett snickered.

"Please," I scoffed.

Then Jasper groaned. "Don't believe us? Look what just walked in."

Emmett and I turned to see what he was talking about. Lauren Mallory. I groaned internally. Fucking great. We went out for about thirty seconds in the tenth grade and the girl dogged my every step for the rest of high school. The sad thing was, it's not like she wasn't hot. She was, in her way. A little obvious and flashy, but attractive. It was the desperation that repelled me, the way she clung to every casual word I threw at her over the years like it meant we were destined to be or some shit.

"Not that I'm advocating or anything, Edward," Emmett said, leaning in conspiratorially, "But you could still totally score there if you were so inclined. The chick still talks about you all the time."

"Last I heard she was engaged to Tyler."

"He dumped her last year. She's back on the market and more than a little desperate, if you ask me," Jasper said.

"Yeah, just what I need, another roll in the hay with Desperate Lauren. I'm not that hard up, thanks."

Emmett snorted and sipped his beer and I turned to ask Jasper how things were going on the force when I heard a distinctly female squeal behind me.

"Oh. My. _God_! Edward!"

"Told ya," Emmett hissed. I kicked his shin and he laughed.

"Hey, Lauren. How are you?" I smiled politely and only half-turned towards her, trying to impress on her that I was only taking a brief break from my conversation with Jasper. She was wearing some really low cut knit shirt, skinny jeans that were more like tights, and a pair of ridiculously high tramp shoes. Desperate was right. And her eager, hopeful expression wasn't helping. Nor was the fact that she'd shown up at Hanlon's alone just a few minutes after we did, like she was staking the place out or something.

"I heard you were back home! This is so exciting!"

"Um, yeah, just for the weekend, though. You know, catching up with old friends." I nodded a head at Jasper trying to give her the hint.

"It's _so_ good to see you! You look amazing! Well, you always did, but you look better!"

I smiled and shot a pleading look at Jasper but he just grinned and shook his head and sipped his beer. Bastard.

"Um, yeah…thanks. You look…um, great, too."

She dipped her chin and tried to shoot me what I'm sure she thought was a very alluring look through her lashes but all I could focus on was how her eyelashes were all glooped together with too much mascara and the effect she was trying to pull off was ruined. She was also shifting, leaning forward slightly, and I realized she was attempting to get her cleavage positioned under my face.

I forced a polite smile and looked over her shoulder, out the window towards the Pence and Pint across the street, wondering if we could somehow ditch Lauren and escape over there. It didn't look so bad. I bet they had better beer.

When I failed to respond further, Lauren asked Emmett how the baby was doing and his response gave her a reason to stay put for another few minutes. I looked back at the front windows and that's when I saw her. She had appeared on the sidewalk in front of Hanlon's while I'd been distracted by Lauren. She was standing close to the street smoking a cigarette, peering down the sidewalk as if she was looking for someone. Thin, long dark hair, pale skin, incredible little china doll features. She was wearing a tight jacket with some skinny little scarf looped a bunch of times around her neck, not for warmth, since it was really mild out tonight. The old school neon sign over the door outside Hanlon's was casting a faint pink light over her from above.

She looked sharp, savvy and a little hip. She definitely did not look like she belonged in Hanlon's even though she was standing in front of the place. She was probably meeting one of the Williamsburg refugees heading into the Pence and Pint across the street. That's where girls like her would hang out.

"See something you like?" Jasper's sarcastic voice made me pull my eyes away from the girl outside and look back at him. I wondered how long I'd been staring at her.

"Huh?"

Jasper tipped his head towards the window. "Her. That's Bella Swan. She must be waiting for Alice."

"You know her?" I asked, thinking that tonight was suddenly starting to look a whole lot brighter, if only I could unload Lauren.

Jasper chuckled. "Yeah, you do, too. She went to Bishop Kenney with us."

I shot him a disbelieving look. "I definitely did _not_ go to high school with that girl. I'd remember something like that."

"Yeah, you did. But her and Alice were freshmen when we were seniors. They were like fourteen. So you probably don't remember her."

I turned the name over in my head…_Bella Swan, Bella Swan_. I felt a tiny tug of familiarity.

"Wait…always wore a hoodie? Tiny thing, real quiet?"

Jasper laughed, "Yeah, that's her. Well, that _was_ her. Super smart. Went to NYU for college. She's in grad school now."

"Who are you guys talking about?" Lauren asked, once she was finished with Emmett. She followed my eyes and glanced over her shoulder. "Oh, Bella," she muttered with a sneer. "What's she doing slumming it at Hanlon's?"

"Meeting Alice and me," Jasper said shortly, giving her a challenging stare. Lauren backed down and shut up.

I glanced back through the window at Bella again, taking a last drag on her cigarette before snuffing it out on the edge of the trashcan on the corner and tidily disposing of her butt inside. I wished this Alice girl would just get here already and bring her inside. I wished Lauren would just take the hint and back off before she did. I was here to spend the night catching up with Emmett and Jasper, but there was no way I was going to pass up an opportunity to talk to that girl if I could manage it. And anyway, Jasper invited his girlfriend so that meant I was off the hook. But first I needed Lauren to be gone.

As I watched, Bella hooked her hair behind her ear and glanced up the street again. Then her pretty face lit up with a smile and she took three quick strides forward, catching another girl—Alice, I assumed— in a tight hug. The two of them hung on to each other for a minute, smiling and talking. Well, Alice was talking. Bella was just nodding along. Alice grabbed her wrist and started pulling her towards the door of Hanlon's. Finally.

"There she is!" Jasper called as the girls appeared at the door. I noticed Lauren take a small step towards me and I leaned away. Alice, who was even smaller than Bella, with her long black hair slicked back in a ponytail, bounced on the balls of her feet when she spotted Jasper at the bar and half-walked, half-scampered towards us. Bella hung back in the doorway for a second, her eyes darting around the bar, appraising. She looked towards our group and then her eyes swiveled to mine and locked. She didn't look away and neither did I and I knew right then that she just noticed me the way I'd noticed her.

I felt a shot of excitement and my pulse escalated at the moment of connection. Then she blinked and looked at Lauren. _Shit_. Without looking back at me she walked through the bar towards us, eyes on Alice. The old guys let her pass unnoticed, but every male under fifty glanced at her surreptitiously as she moved through, leaving a wake of awareness behind her. She was probably the best thing this bar had seen in a decade. She was certainly a step up from the low-rent likes of Lauren Mallory.

I knew if I wanted a chance to talk to this girl I needed to remove Lauren from the mix immediately. I stood up, hoping Jasper and Emmett would catch on fast.

"Hey, Lauren," I said in as neutral a tone as I could manage, "It was great seeing you again, but I think we're going to move to a table and catch up for a bit." I tossed my head towards the guys, giving a clear indication that I wasn't extending an invitation to join us.

She forced a bright smile and a casual shrug, "Oh sure! I see some friends in the back anyway. It was great seeing you, Edward."

I was nodding and turned away but she was _still_ talking to me, reaching out to grab my arm, "Call me this weekend if you want to hang out or something. Okay?"

I just smiled and shrugged. Thank God Jasper and Emmett were quick to catch on and had already intercepted Alice and Bella before they ever reached the bar, herding them towards a table and away from Lauren. By the time I fully extricated myself from Lauren and caught up, Jasper was just settling Bella into a chair before darting to the other side of the table to flop down beside Alice. There was only one chair left, next to Bella. That's Jasper, the eternal wingman.

I slid into the seat next to her and she turned to face me finally, a slightly sardonic smile on her face.

"Sorry to interrupt," she said. "You didn't have to leave on our account."

"You weren't interrupting anything. _Really_. I think I missed the introductions. I'm Edward."

I stuck my hand towards her and she glanced down at it, a private little smile on her lips. She had a great mouth. Finally she took my hand, barely gripping it at all before sliding her hand away again.

"Bella."

"Hey, Edward, this is Alice," Jasper said, pulling my attention away from Bella. "Ally, this is Edward."

Alice shot a hand out at me eagerly. "I have heard _all_ about you!" she laughed, as she shook my hand hard.

"Don't listen to a word this asshole says about me. All lies."

Jasper laughed and flipped me off.

We settled in to chat for a bit, about the fire department, the police department, all the usual old neighborhood conversations. Alice worked as a receptionist at Jasper's precinct, which is how they'd reconnected this year. Not that they'd really known each other in high school. She was a fun girl, she talked a mile a minute and darted from subject to subject like a hummingbird. She told the raunchiest stories about all the crazy people she dealt with at the reception desk at the precinct and had us all laughing uproariously at them. I didn't know her well, but so far I liked her a whole lot more than that morose, bitchy Maria chick Jasper had been so serious about a few years back. Alice was a distinct improvement over her.

Talking with all of them and listening to Alice's stories was fun, but I really wanted to learn more about Bella and she just wasn't talking. I kept waiting for her to insert herself in the conversation, but she barely did. She just smiled and played with her beer and laughed now and then at Alice's stories. If I wanted this to happen, I was going to have to be bold. So when Jasper, Alice and Emmett starting trading gossip about the latest drug bust of one of the neighborhood regulars, I seized my chance.

"So," I began, angling towards her a little, "You're from the neighborhood?"

"Yeah, originally. I'm just home visiting my mom for the weekend."

"Me, too. Just visiting the family. I live in Boston now."

"I know.

"You do?"

She smirked, "Yeah, the neighborhood practically went into mourning when you moved away."

She knew who I was before tonight. That had me intrigued me, but I decided to let it go for the moment. If I drew attention to it, I'd just end up looking like a dick.

"Jasper said you're in school. What are you studying?"

"American history. I'm getting my masters."

"Wow. Impressive."

She didn't say anything in response, she just shrugged dismissively and sipped her beer.

It _was_ impressive. I was kind of intimidated by her, actually. All I had was two years out at Kingsborough Community before I joined the fire department. I wasn't stupid or anything, but school had just never been my thing. I might have had the gumption to move the hell out of Bayswater, but at the end of the day I was just some firefighter, living the exact same life as Emmett and Jasper, just in a different city. She was something way beyond that. For a moment, I doubted the wisdom of pursuing her, but I hadn't gotten anywhere in life being shy, so I sucked it up and soldiered on.

I'd made an effort to squeeze us out of the table conversation so that I could talk to her one on one and now I had absolutely nothing to say to her. Alice, Jasper and Emmett were wrapped up in their conversation and we were stranded with each other and a lot of silence. I figured the polite thing to do was to keep talking, even though I didn't have a damned thing of interest to say to her.

"Smart as you are, you must be pretty glad to be clear of this place."

Her eyes shot to me over the rim of her cup. "What do you mean?" she snapped.

I held up a hand in defense. "I didn't mean anything. Just…not much of a future staying in Bayswater for somebody as smart as you. Why?"

She closed her eyes and sighed, shaking her head a little. "Sorry, sorry. I'm just a little…"

"What?"

She opened her eyes and smiled. "It's nothing."

I nudged her knee with mine under the table and it looked like she flushed slightly. "Tell me," I urged softly.

"Just…" her eyes shifted around the room and fixed on a spot in the middle distance. "Everybody is so proud when you achieve something, when you pull yourself up and out of here. But then when you come back it's like they want you to be just the same as you were. If you're different, they resent you."

Finally her eyes cut back to me, her expression a little embarrassed. But I nodded quickly to encourage her, because I knew exactly what she was talking about.

"Everybody bitches about what a dead end it is, but if you try something different it's like you're judging them because they didn't."

"Exactly!" she said, pivoting towards me a little. "Why is it _bad_ that I went away to school?" She cast a glance over her shoulder towards where Lauren had drifted away earlier and I could guess who'd been giving her a hard time.

"It's not. It's amazing. You must have had to work your ass off for that. NYU is really expensive, right?"

She twisted back to me, eyes wide. Brown. Her eyes were brown, with long, feathery lashes. With her dark eyes and hair, there was something slightly exotic about her looks. I wondered if she was maybe Italian. She was from the neighborhood, and the Italians and Irish built this neighborhood. Bella…definitely Italian. Her fingers were back to twisting her cup in circles on the table. "I didn't…I had a scholarship. My dad…"

She trailed off, staring down into her beer. But as soon as she mentioned her father, a bunch of memories sprang to the forefront of my brain. Fuck.

"Charlie Swan," I said. "You're Charlie Swan's kid, right?"

She nodded.

I don't know why it took me so long to connect it. There was a plaque in the back of the bar in his honor. Charlie Swan, another cop from the neighborhood, shot when he walked into a bank in the middle of a hold-up. He hadn't even been on duty, but he thought the guys would get away before backup arrived. I remember hearing about it, I remembered he had a daughter, but I was picturing a little kid.

"Ah, crap. I'm really sorry, Bella."

She threw me a tight little smile.

"It's alright. I'm fine. It was the bank. You know…where it happened. They established a scholarship fund."

"That's great. It's great you had that opportunity."

"I'd have rather had my dad."

I nodded in understanding. I was fortunate enough to have never lost anyone in the line of duty, but in a neighborhood like Bayswater, full of cops and firefighters, it was inevitable that you knew someone who had.

Bella took a deep breath and continued brightly, trying to lighten the mood, "So, what took you to Boston when your whole family is here?"

I snorted softly. "That's pretty much it."

"What? Your family?"

"Not them specifically. I love my parents. It's all the rest," I waved my hand dismissively.

Bella smiled and nudged my knee with hers under the table.

"Come on, it's your turn to share."

I shot a grin at her but started talking nonetheless. "You know what it's like here. Your whole life is set in stone from the minute you're born. You go to Sacred Heart, then you go to Bishop Kenney for high school, then you become a cop or a firefighter. You marry someone from the neighborhood, have your kids, send them off to Sacred Heart and it starts all over again."

She'd set her cup down now and was just looking at me intently. "Emmett and Jasper seem happy enough."

I shrugged, "I just wanted to see if I could do something _else_."

"That's really brave."

I laughed. "Not really. I'm a firefighter, just the same, only in Boston instead of New York. Big fucking deal."

She shook her head, "Leaving is hard. Trust me, I know. It doesn't matter what you do. You picked the harder path."

I shrugged, "In a way. But half the time I'm not even sure why I bothered. I miss my family, my friends... And I'm doing the same damned thing there that I would be here."

"So why don't you move back?"

"Hell, I don't know. Still trying to prove something to myself, I guess. I just have no idea what that is." Then I snorted dismissively. "Jesus, listen to my emo bullshit! Sorry to dump all that on you when we've just met."

She laughed. "I did it, too, remember?"

"Right. Here's to oversharing." I raised my glass to her. She grinned and did the same. "Except we're not entirely strangers, are we?"

Her smile froze and her eyes looked a little freaked. I'd wanted to move us into a more intimate conversation by bringing up the fact that we'd crossed paths before, but now I was second-guessing myself.

"What do you mean?"

"Jasper says we went to high school together."

She studied me for a moment. "But you don't remember me?" she finally asked. Not like she was hurt, more like she was verifying.

I shook my head, "Not really, and I'm sorry that I don't."

She snorted dismissively. "I'm not."

"Why do you say that?"

She closed her eyes and shook her head a little. "Forget it. I was fourteen, you know? Who wants to be remembered like they were at fourteen?"

"I still wish I remembered you," I said softly.

She looked back up at me, her eyes a little sharp and fierce. She saw too much, this girl. I felt stripped bare when she looked at me like that. It was disconcerting, but I also couldn't look away. I didn't want to look away.

"Can I get you another beer?" I said, clearing my throat and straightening up a little. She sat back and exhaled, shaking her head.

"Yeah, sure. Thanks."

I stood and checked with the other three, who were still engrossed in their conversation about the local junkie that we'd all gone to high school with, but none of them wanted a refill yet.

I gave my order to Hughie and propped my foot on the brass rail while he poured them, looking back over my shoulder at Bella. She was still twirling her now-empty cup, staring at her hands pensively.

"Hey again!"

I stifled a groan. Lauren was back at my side like a fucking leech.

"Hey," I said with as little enthusiasm as possible. "Where are your friends?"

She shrugged and ran a hand over her hair. "Around. But why would I talk to them when I could be talking to you? It really is so great to see you back home again, Edward. So did you hear I split up with Tyler?" It all came out in a forced, semi-flirtatious rush.

"Yeah, I think I heard that from Jasper. Sorry it didn't work out."

She leaned on the bar and towards me a little, her elbow nearly touching mine, her tits on prominent display right under my nose. "I'm not. He couldn't handle me. I guess I just need more in a man, if you know what I mean."

I shifted back in discomfort and cast a pleading glance in Hughie's direction. He was headed towards me with the beers, not a minute too soon.

"Yeah, well…." I couldn't come up with any response to her blatant come on. "I, um…my friends are waiting."

Lauren's face hardened instantly. "Taking a shot at Bella Swan, huh?"

"What?"

Lauren's possibly-pretty face screwed up in an ugly sneer. "You don't have a chance there, Edward. Since she went off to her fancy college, you think she's going to give the time of day to anybody from Bayswater? Please!"

My eyes narrowed in anger and I stepped back away from her. "Jealously is really unattractive on you, Lauren. _Really_ unattractive."

I hit her where it hurt and I knew it, but frankly she had it coming. I was pissed and…protective. I felt weirdly protective of this girl I just met and barely knew. Except I felt like I knew Bella better in just a few minutes than I did Lauren, who I'd known nearly all my life. Fucked up, but true. Lauren opened and closed her mouth once. Then she threw her chin up and snorted, "Whatever, Edward. Enjoy getting shot down by Miss College Girl."

I turned away in disgust but immediately registered Bella's empty chair. What the fuck?

I spun my head around just in time to see her disappearing through the back door.

"Where is Bella going?"

Alice looked up, smirking. "Out for a smoke. She didn't want to um…intrude."

"What, on _that_?"

I wanted to go after her, but I felt bad cutting out on my buddies to chase after a girl. But this felt different, not some girl. This felt important in some way I couldn't quite explain. I looked to Jasper and Emmett and they were both barely containing their laughter.

Jasper shook his head and threw an arm over the back of Alice's chair. "It's cool, just go, man. We'll catch up later."

"And be nice to her!" Alice chimed in.

I smiled my thanks at them before bolting for the back door. I burst through it and out onto the sidewalk on Bay Place, almost barreling right into her where she was leaning against the wall smoking.

"Hey! Careful!"

"Sorry, I got back to the table and you were gone." Now that I'd just come tracking her down like this I felt ridiculous.

"So you came out here to find me?"

"Yeah," I shrugged and tried to appear a little less crazed than I felt.

"Well, I um…didn't want to cramp your style or anything. It looked like my presence might be a problem for you."

"With Lauren?" I scoffed. "Forget it. Not a chance."

"She wants you," Bella said. "_Bad_."

"That doesn't mean I want her. To tell you the truth, my attention is focused in another direction right now."

She dropped her cigarette away from her face and just looked at me. I swallowed hard around my anxiety. I just pretty much laid myself on the line there. If she was really going to blow me off, this is where she'd excuse herself and go back in to Alice or go home. I held my breath and just looked back into her eyes, willing her to stay here with me.

Slowly she snuffed her cigarette out on the wall next to her and dropped it into the standing ashtray by the back door.

"Buy me an ice cream?"

"Huh?"

She tipped her head across the street, to the tiny ice cream stand where we used to buy rainbow snow cones when we were kids. "Loretta's is still open. You want an ice cream?"

I stifled a laugh and nodded. "Sure, ice cream would be good."

She cracked a smile at me then and I swallowed hard. I had no idea what we were doing here, but we were definitely about to do _something_. She pushed off the wall and we walked across the street. There was a dad with his son ahead of us, so Bella perused the handwritten list of flavors while we waited.

"Oh, they have homemade gelato! Blood orange. Mmm, that sounds good, doesn't it?"

I smiled at her enthusiasm for some weird-ass ice cream flavor. I ordered a straight up chocolate ice cream, like a normal person.

We got our ice cream and spoons and wandered a few feet away to take a bite.

"You want to, um… take a walk?" I asked. I sounded like some freaking nervous teenager. She smiled at me sideways around her spoon, which I was now jealous of.

"Sure, where to?"

"How about the park?"

"At night?"

"We won't go very far in and besides, you're with me. I'll protect you."

So we started walking, slowly so we could eat our ice cream at the same time, down Bay Place and over towards the park.

"You have to taste this. Here." Bella was shoving her plastic spoon full of ice cream in my face. "Open up," she urged.

My lips twitched as I tried to stifle my laughter. She was so damned cute. Then I obediently opened my mouth and she smiled as she slid her spoon in between my lips.

"Good, huh?"

"Um…mmm," I murmured. It was good, actually. Really good. Better was the little flicker of something in her face when she pulled her spoon back. She was looking at my mouth. And looking with interest.

There were still people out on the sidewalk near the bar, patrons milling in front of Hanlon's and in front of The Pence and Pint across the street. But as we rounded Monsignor Paulson Square towards the entrance to the park, the people thinned out and we got further away from the street lights. It was just her and me, alone in the dark.

"So tell me about grad school. Are you still at NYU?" Her being in New York was going to put a serious crimp in my plans.

"Um, no. I'm somewhere else for grad school now."

"Where?"

She laughed and nudged her elbow into me. "What are you, my stalker or something?"

"I was just asking!" I laughed, nudging her back. "Fine, don't tell me. I'll get it out of you sooner or later."

"What about you? Boston, huh? Where abouts?"

"Arlington. Well, my firehouse is there. My apartment is in Somerville. Do you know Boston at all?"

"A little. I know where that is. Do you like it?"

"It's alright. It's different in a lot of little ways from Brooklyn, but in the end it's just the same. Like they just have all their own little neighborhood stuff. Not better or worse than here."

I tossed my cup into a trashcan as we passed into the park and slid my hands into my back pockets to keep them still. I was freaking nervous as hell around this girl, which was a really disconcerting feeling. Bella just kept her eyes focused front and ate her ice cream, taking her time to clean the spoon off thoroughly after every bite. If I didn't know any better, I'd think she was doing it on purpose.

"So," I said, a little too loudly now that we were in the quiet of the park, "You wanna tell me why you're actually glad I can't remember you from high school? Was I a dick to you or something? 'Cause I know I could be a dick in high school, but hey, I was a kid and I was really…."

"You weren't a dick to me," she said evenly. "You'd have to actually be aware of someone's existence to be a dick to them."

"I was aware you existed. Sort of."

She snorted.

"Okay, fine. I was an unobservant dick."

She laughed. "Trust me, there wasn't much to observe. I'd pretty much perfected the art of disappearing into the wall." Then she looked back at me. "Not like you."

"Me?"

"Everybody knew who you were, Edward Cullen."

"That's hardly—"

"They knew," she cut me off. "They noticed. They still do."

She tipped her head back the way we'd come, silently indicating Lauren.

"Did you know? Did you notice?" I asked quietly. That shut her up. She looked away at the darkness of the trees bordering the path.

"My mom lives on 12th," she finally said.

"Oh," I scrambled to keep up with her shift of conversation. "That's—"

"You used to run up 12th with the football team on your way to practice in the park every day after school."

I didn't say anything. She wasn't making eye contact, still staring at the trees.

"I told my mom I could think better outside, so I sat on our stoop every afternoon after school to do my homework, even when it was cold."

Her confession of a nine-year-old crush was wreaking havoc on me. Yeah, she'd been fourteen and a wallflower and I'd been a brainless, blind eighteen-year-old jock. I still wanted to shout "She _liked_ me!" to the entire deserted park. Instead, I reached out and snagged her hand, rubbing her fingertips with mine.

"Wasn't it hard to write with cold hands?"

She finally looked back at me with her wide, dark eyes, all shadows and tiny glints of light. "It was worth it."

"Even when I never noticed you there?"

She shrugged. "I just wanted to see you. I didn't expect you to notice me."

"I'm noticing you now."

Finally, the corner of her mouth quirked slightly, almost a smile. "I noticed that."

It was too soon to kiss her, and neither one of us was drunk enough for it. I didn't care. I still wanted to kiss her. The moment definitely felt like a kiss was coming. Surrounded by the dark of this path in the park, her hand still in mine, her confession still hanging in the air between us, it felt entirely right, inevitable even.

So I kissed her.

I took it slow, took my time leaning in, so she had plenty of time to plant her hand on my chest and turn her face away.

She didn't.

She held still as I pressed my mouth against hers. When I curled a finger under her chin to turn her face up to me, she began to kiss back. Slow, gentle, my finger tilting her head back, our hands tangled together, we kissed in the dark park.

"Was that too soon?" I whispered when we stopped. I didn't back away, keeping my face close to hers, so close I could feel her breath on my neck.

"I kissed you back, so no." Her words were snarky, but her voice was soft and breathless. I tugged on her hand to pull her closer. Her shoulder pressed into my chest and I rested my chin on her hair, letting go of her hand to curl my arm around her back.

"I like you, Bella." I winced. That had to be the lamest thing I'd ever said to a girl.

She chuckled and rested her head on my chest, just over my heart. "I like you, too. But I just confessed that, so no surprise there."

"That was different. You were just a kid."

"So were you. I like you better now."

I chuckled and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "Nice to know I've improved."

A bunch of teenagers on skateboards raced by us on the roadway, shouting to each other, overflowing with energy and tension. It broke the moment and I remembered where we were, in a dark park, alone. Probably a smart idea to move along.

"You have no idea how much I wish we weren't in this crummy, pitch black park right now," I said.

She chuckled and I felt the soft vibration through my chest. "Not exactly conducive to…"

She trailed off, at a loss to describe what was happening to us.

"Beginnings," I finished.

She leaned back enough to look up at me. "Is that what we're doing? Beginning?"

I reached up to touch her cheek, running a fingertip down to her chin. "I'd like to think so. I _hope_ so."

I could just barely make out her smile. "Me, too."

"Okay, so agreed. We're… beginning. What now?"

Bella sighed. "I need to get home. My mother never got the memo that I grew up and moved out. She's probably waiting up for me."

"Seriously?" Sliding my hand around hers, I steered us towards the path leading out towards 12th Avenue.

She shrugged. "It's annoying, but I get it. Since I moved away for grad school, she's all alone in that house. It's hard on her even though she'd deny that to her dying day."

Bella's words sent an unpleasant pang through my chest. We were in this Brooklyn bubble, the two of us thrown back into each other's orbit for the weekend, but I lived in Boston and she was in grad school… somewhere. We needed to sort that out, but maybe not this second, when everything was still brand new and fragile. I wanted to just enjoy this moment, her hand in mine as we walked slowly down these streets I'd known my whole life.

Like she could read my mind, she said, "It's pretty here, isn't it? I don't always see it because it's so familiar, but Bayswater is..."

She was looking up at the lattice of leaves covering the streetlight, casting a complex pattern across the sidewalk and us. I was looking at her—her delicate profile, her long lashes, her perfect lips.

"Beautiful," I finished for her. "It's beautiful."

She squeezed my fingers and smiled.

Bella's mom only lived a few blocks from the park, but it took us forever to get there. We walked slowly, talking in quiet voices, trading nonsense memories of this place and these people. When we got tired of stories, I pulled her into the shadows next to Nick's Deli and pressed her against the brick wall and kissed her again. We stayed there a while, getting to know each other in a different, wordless way.

When we started walking again, I felt drunk, or dreaming, or some crazy waking combination of both. There was no other way to explain the glow the world had taken on. Familiar brownstones and worn stoops looked perfect and magical tonight. Living room lights glowing behind lace curtains felt like home and comfort, not the stifling predictable sameness that had driven me away. I found myself imagining all kinds of crazy things about me and the girl at my side. I could see us here in Bayswater, home for both of us. I could imagine holidays with my parents and her mom, and all our friends and their families, one giant sprawling family, a neighborhood made up of nothing but connections. I couldn't believe I'd ever found that idea so repellent.

"What are you thinking?" Bella said finally, her voice little more than a whisper on the quiet street.

I chuckled. "Too much. You don't want to know where my brain is going right now, Bella. I'd freak you out."

"Hmmm. You might be surprised. I'm having some pretty crazy thoughts myself. This has been a crazy night, hasn't it?"

"But great. Tonight has been great."

"This is me."

"What?"

"My house. Well, my mom's house."

We were standing in front of a stoop, no different than any other on the block, one I'd passed thousands of times in my life. And all the time, she was there, on the other side of the door, growing up and waiting for me to do the same.

"When do you leave?" I asked her, reaching out for her other hand.

"Tomorrow afternoon. You?"

"Same."

And here we were again. Me headed back to Boston and her heading back to school.

"Bella, I know this is fast. Crazy-insane fast, since, we've only known each other—well, known each other this time around—for three hours, but I have no intention of letting you leave like this didn't happen. Can we talk? Or visit or—"

"Edward—"

"I mean, I know this is intense, but you feel this, too, right? We can't just—"

"Edward—"

"—forget it and walk away. And I'm not okay with randomly hooking up whenever we happen to be home at the same time. So—"

"Edward!"

"What?"

"Bee You."

"What? What does that mean?"

She laughed softly and her tense shoulders sagged. "I'm at BU. For grad school."

I blinked at her. "BU. As in—"

"Boston University."

I felt the smile on my face penetrating every corner of my body. "Boston, huh? That's handy."

She smiled back and her smile somehow made me feel it even more. "Mm-hmm," she hummed, leaning towards me. "Except I've been thinking of moving back home after I graduate."

I leaned in until my lips were just inches from hers. "You don't say? Because lately I've been thinking about the same thing."

Her hands slid up my forearms just as I reached out for her hips, pulling her into me. The shape of her was already becoming familiar to me, just like this place, something I'd been looking at for years but never really seen.

"Well, you know what they say," she murmured, her breath whispering across my mouth.

"What's that?"

"There's no place like home."

As I kissed her, falling again into the warmth and rightness of her, I knew she was right. And I knew I'd found mine.

*0*0*

**A/N: I wrote most of this over two years ago, sort of as a love letter to my real life neighborhood in Brooklyn. The names have all been changed to protect the innocent! **


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